tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6510624476585230434.post7058164734721103703..comments2024-02-11T08:56:42.753+00:00Comments on It's Not A Zero Sum Game: Empowered, but empowered to do what?Marina Shttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14449789093721258516noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6510624476585230434.post-4856431292361031662013-06-28T11:00:56.408+01:002013-06-28T11:00:56.408+01:00I think this is just as much a misunderstanding of...I think this is just as much a misunderstanding of what people mean by "empowerment" means as a simplistic "stripping is empowering"! <br /><br />When women say that they find high heels or sex work or whatever empowering, what they usually mean is "in a cultural context which says I'm not supposed to enjoy this or find it a positive experience, I am choosing to do it and find that that's a good decision for me". It doesn't ever mean that it is empowering for all women (although some women phrase it that way - I think they're wrong.) It's a bad thing that patriarchy tells women that certain activities are not allowed or not respectable or not to be sought: it's empowering to rebel against that. When feminism mimics patriarchy by describing some decisions or activities as "unfeminist", then of course for the people who do want to do those activities it's empowering. <br /><br />Most women don't distinguish between "patriarchy tells me I shouldn't do X, even though I feel that X would be right for me" and "feminism tells me I shouldn't do X, even though I feel that X would be right for me." It's all just the same sense that you're not supposed to, and pushing against that is an empowering feeling, whether it's me holding hands with my partner in the street, wearing red lipstick or my friend choosing to adopt her husband's name. <br /><br />Besides which, you can claim all you like that patriarchy approves of women stripping and accepting the male gaze: we all know that patriarchy has always simultaneously demanded that women accept the male gaze and that women make sure not to appear to court or encourage it. Stripping is just as much a rebellion against the traditional patriarchal idea of "good girls don't do this" as it is against the more modern one of "good feminists don't do this", and both are equally oppressive to people who enjoy exhibitionism. Or for the women who don't necessarily enjoy it but find it empowering to be able to pay the rent and feed their children. <br /><br />Once you get off that stage, or take off those clothes or whatever, there is no power that you take away with you that you can sue to effect real change in the world.<br /><br />I don't agree. Activists who engage in sex work and sex workers who engage in activism have made a huge difference in my life by explaining Plenty of sex workers take that experience and use it to inform a powerful critique of patriarchy, class prejudice and capitalism. I've learned a huge amount from sex worker activists. <br /><br />(And plenty don't. But many women don't: sex workers aren't particularly culpable in that regard.)<br /><br />(Sorry, reposted as I was logged in on a different ID.)marykmachttp://www.twitter.com/marykmacnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6510624476585230434.post-20214966795159690132013-06-28T10:58:05.913+01:002013-06-28T10:58:05.913+01:00This comment has been removed by the author.marykmachttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09111248946430990894noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6510624476585230434.post-53828893140612636172013-01-25T10:29:57.416+00:002013-01-25T10:29:57.416+00:00Great post, you have pointed out some superb detai...Great post, you have pointed out some superb details, I will tell my friends that this is a very informative blog thanks.<br />Marina Developmenthttp://www.cumberlandharbourga.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6510624476585230434.post-75774773438284179512013-01-23T10:00:45.421+00:002013-01-23T10:00:45.421+00:00I agree so much with this! I also think re the ide...I agree so much with this! I also think re the idea of exerting sexual power as being empowering in any meaningful way, it's hardly a "feminist" act or anti-patriarchy to do something that men have, since the dawn of time, encouraged women to do. Even in oppressive cultures where women are banned from expressing THEMSELVES sexually, there are prostitutes, strippers, porn etc in some form or other. Men in those cultures often don't want "their" women from doing those things but to my mind to do something that most men encourage, celebrate, think is fun, and don't find threatening, then go ahead, but don't kid yourself that you're somehow empowering yourself from a feminist perspective. <br /><br />When asking if something is anti-patriarchy (or anti-kyriarchy or anti-anything basically) I think it's helpful to ask: is this DIFFICULT? Are people trying to stop me doing this? Do sexist men get angry at me and feel threatened by this? When I write an article saying raping a woman in her sleep is wrong I get rape threats and abuse. When I say I used to go to strip clubs because I liked watching the women I get a high five. It's not threatening. If it's easy, if the dominant forces in society encourage it, if it gets you social kudos, if the people who judge you are women/feminists, and the people who celebrate you are sexist men, then maybe that should give you cause to stop and pause, and think about why that might be the case. <br /><br />Men have ALWAYS allowed women that "power to withhold sex" and the "power" to tease/be a sexual object/etc, ALWAYS, ALWAYS ALWAYS. Far from being a modern liberated freedom from patriarchy. this is the only form of power women have been allowed, and I believe that this is because it doesn't actually exist. Men can, if they want to, force sex on us anyway. And often in a patriarchal culture they can get away with it. So the power to withhold/give sex etc only exists as long as the man/men in question are generous enough to not rape you, and, again, in a patriarchal society not raping a woman who sexually teases you etc seems to get you some kind of gold medal. <br /><br />So I think it's 100% for women to sexualise themselves etc til the cows come home... but feminist and empowering and anti-patriarchy? I don't buy it. <br /><br />From LouMcCuddenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com